So there's a new vampire movie out, and I really need a few hours to sit and take in someone else's vision of impossibility with the hope of seeing something cool. These factors combined to put me in a theater seat watching Ultraviolet, despite having nothing more than the posters and the previews to go on.

I'll give you the short version: it's bad. Really bad. So bad I'm surprised I sat through the whole thing (which probably had a lot to do with the fact that if I didn't, I would have to start thinking again -- something that I was trying to avoid in the few hours between work and more work that I had).